lovestrippedbare: (joyous.)
jeon jΟ…ngΔΈooΔΈ ([personal profile] lovestrippedbare) wrote2019-03-09 03:19 pm
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π•–π•Ÿπ•–π•£π•˜π•šπ•”π• 

There are times, Jungkook thinks, when unexpected changes in plan work out for the best. Giving up on the idea of Busan during winter break wasn't the easiest choice at the time — Jungkook had expected it to be the highlight of their winter, and giving into the pressure of Yeongwook's blackmailing hurt on multiple levels. But distance seemed safest. Planning, biding their time, having Jungkook carefully siphon a portion of his allowance over to Yoongi for safekeeping, every passing day made the trip feel more viable again, until the two of them suddenly realized that Yoongi's birthday would be an easy occasion to leave for, and that was that.

They've picked up memories along the way. The first night Jungkook had Yoongi stay over. The first dinner together with his mother, with her offering countless thanks for helping her youngest with his studies. A trip out to a nameless beach, all seven of them together, huddled and bracing against the last of the winter winds.

Getting to March isn't as difficult as Jungkook expected it to be, and now that they're here, the wait has made everything all the sweeter.

He takes countless pictures with his camera — of their seats together on the train, of the little box meals they buy from the lady with the cart. Of the ramyeon they buy an hour later, when it's clear that the box meals are more packaging than substance.

Of Yoongi, staring out the window of the train car, a soft smile on his face.

At first, Jungkook struggled with the idea of spending much of Yoongi's birthday on the train, but the trip to Busan takes several hours at best, which would have required missing class on Friday. Seeing Yoongi's peaceful expression on the train helps to set a little of that regret to rest, as does the stifled laughter they share as they stumble down the hall to their room in the hotel.

"Hotel Elysee," Jungkook says with a flourish as he waits for Yoongi to swipe their room key. "Is that, like, French?"
likedriedflowerpetals: [jungkook, music] (positive, neutral) (into your heart from under your skin)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-08 06:45 am (UTC)(link)
God help him, Yoongi blushes, coloring immediately, as if saying the words is somehow awful in a way the action itself wasn't. "I was curious," he says, a hint of defensiveness in it although there's nothing mocking or accusatory in Jungkook's tone, only curiosity of his own. There is, he knows, no reason to be embarrassed about the things he wants to do. Jungkook has never given him reason to be, for one. Sometimes, though, it isn't as easy to avoid that feeling of shame that comes with talking about sex as it is to think that he shouldn't feel it.

He takes a moment to think, breathing slow and deep, feeling the way Jungkook's hand rises and falls with his chest. Moving together, always together. "I don't know," he says, which doesn't actually mean he doesn't know so much as it does that he's gathering his thoughts. "I like pretty much everything we've done. Didn't think I'd be that into tying you up, but..." It had intrigued him immediately, he can't deny that, but it's not like he'd thought much about it before. Now, what Jungkook said earlier about trying other kinds of knots and such proves exciting. "I don't know that I'm into anything all that kinky other than that. I've thought about fucking you from behind, but I think I might miss looking at you too much." Which, he thinks, is somehow one of the sappiest things he's ever said.

Thoughtful, he brushes his fingers through Jungkook's hair where it threatens to fall into his eyes. "Still want you to fuck me some time. And I liked today. Being in public. I mean, it was kind of terrifying, but in a good way."
likedriedflowerpetals: [jungkook] (positive) so fond (take me to the feeling)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-10 03:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Watching Jungkook, the way he smiles now, so satisfied, so happy, all Yoongi can do is relax into his touch, willing his mind to follow suit. It's so easy to second-guess himself, so easy to doubt. He forgets again and again that, when he makes himself voice that, Jungkook is always there to soften the worry and set him right. It's ridiculous to be embarrassed by much of anything at this point. They're a mess of sweat and limbs and each other's bodily fluids; there's nothing they can't share.

Even so, he ducks his head at Jungkook's words, viscerally reminded of earlier, how he'd struggled to keep quiet so no one would catch them. He's usually careful, knowing the last thing he needs is to get caught by his dad, but this was something else entirely, the risk even higher, the thrill even greater. "God, you too," he says, barely an exhale. "That was... really hot. And, yeah, let's try that sometime, from behind. Worst that happens is we don't like it as much." He strokes his hand slowly up and down Jungkook's side as he talks, watching him. There's something weirdly sweet about Jungkook when he's like this. He's just so excited and curious, and it helps coax Yoongi to meet him halfway there. He shrugs. "I don't know. I feel like I'm still figuring things out, but I like trying things with you."
likedriedflowerpetals: [jungkook] (positive) soft boy :( (I'd run awayβ€š I'd run away with you)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-11 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Absurd as it is, Yoongi grins, almost laughs. Jungkook might be exaggerating, but it pleases him all the same, and, besides, there's a kernel of truth in it. Even if something they try doesn't work out, the trying would probably be fun in itself. It's exploring each other that's so good and exciting about sex. As much as he enjoys the rush of the act itself, he doubts it would feel half as good without the connection they have. His smile stretches his cheeks, pressing against the soft touch of Jungkook's fingers, and he turns his head to give a quick kiss to his palm.

It feels right now like he has everything he could ever want. Hand skimming back down to the small of Jungkook's back, he leans closer, presses their foreheads gently together. "Me either," he says, soft. "I love you so much." There's nothing here but them β€” no school pressure, no parents to ignore or hurt them, nothing but the way their bodies feel tangled together like this, the gentleness of Jungkook's touch and voice. There's just something about being together like this that seems to clear away the shadows in his head, leaving him calm and content in a way he can't remember being before they started dating.
likedriedflowerpetals: [jungkook] (positive) so fond (take me to the feeling)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-15 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
Yoongi can only imagine what people would say if they knew how sure he and Jungkook are of each other. Even if his father accepted that he was in love with another boy, Yoongi knows he'd tell him he's too young to think of marriage. And maybe for other teenagers, that's true. Lots of his peers are too young and flighty for this. They might love deeply, but they aren't ready to think of commitment in these terms. But when Yoongi thinks of the rest of his life, this is what he wants β€” not some bright generic forever, but a lifetime of moments tangled up in each other, or like in his kitchen when his father's gone for the day, the two of them cooking, or coming back from the shower to find Jungkook doing the laundry. A hundred tiny things, all the little tokens of domesticity. A home.

Their home will never be silent, he thinks. Even when it's quiet, it will always be music.

"What if I don't want to wait?" he asks softly. He's pretty sure, at times like this, the only things stopping them from just eloping are that their marriage isn't legal yet and that their friends would kill them. "Just wanna be with you."
likedriedflowerpetals: (pic#13645748)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-19 03:57 pm (UTC)(link)
The room swims a little, hazy, as Jungkook moves his ring. It's not even the real thing, not even a ring big enough to fit on his finger all the way, not quite there, and yet β€” his breath hitches and he's not sure he even realized just how much he really does want that. And Yoongi knows, because he spends a lot of time in his own head, that it's probably all tangled up in his own parents' marriage. The way that, no matter how things ended, there were times when they seemed so happy, they'd almost shine. It wasn't a perfect marriage, but it had its moments, and that's what Yoongi's found himself clinging to over the years, like proof that true love and happiness are possible. But mostly it's to do with this, the way Jungkook looks at him, the way Yoongi's heart flutters when he does.

So he leans close and kisses him, hand lifting to Jungkook's cheek, slow and tender and deep. "In my heart," he echoes, agreeing. How any of it will fall into place as they get older, he doesn't know. He doesn't think he expects the government to catch up with them any time soon, and their parents are something altogether more difficult to get around, but all of that matters less when Jungkook says things like that. In their hearts, they're as good as married, and not much else matters. "But we're still gonna do it for real someday."
likedriedflowerpetals: [fire] (neg, neutral) (this is fine)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-20 01:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Three years seems like a long time to wait, but Yoongi nods anyway. Jungkook will need to turn twenty before they can really carry through and, anyway, they'll want to get settled in university and be able to find somewhere to live. They'll probably need jobs, too, on top of school, because, even here, in this quiet, contented space, he can't hide from the certainty that his father will disown him once he's out.

But that's something for future Yoongi to worry about. Now Yoongi has Jungkook's lips brushing whisper-soft against his skin as he talks, his body warm and sweet against Yoongi's, weaving dreams out of thin air. It feels good to hear Jungkook talk like this. He's never been what Yoongi would call closed off, but it's as if something has come unlatched in him now, left him swinging wide open.

"Well, we'll either have to set a time-limit for Namjoon," he muses, "or tell Seokjin that if he tells more than three terrible jokes, we're kicking him out mid-ceremony. We'll let Hoseok take over."
likedriedflowerpetals: [jungkook] (positive) so fond (take me to the feeling)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-21 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Yoongi laughs, and he is soft, soft, soft, fond from his eyes to his toes, thinking of Jungkook holding his hands and kissing him the way he does, surrounded by their friends, who'll laugh at them and throw sand maybe and jeer, but all of it with so much love.

Jungkook says he didn't think his life was bad, though Yoongi disagrees, would still save him from it if he could. Yoongi knows his own isn't what it should be, that he's grieved too big a loss for his age, for any age, and that his father is no help to him. But they have their friends, this perfect little family, and they have each other, and some days β€” most days, when he's feeling alright, which is a lot lately β€” that feels like enough to call himself lucky anyway.

He leans on his side, gazing down at Jungkook, head propped on one hand as the other traces a line slowly down Jungkook's chest. They should shower, but this moment is too peaceful to disrupt. "That's all I want," he says. "To make you happy. That I get to be any part of that..." He hates ever to mention the way his brain so often betrays them, let alone at a moment like this, but he can't just pretend it away either, shrugging. "Even with the others around, I don't think I've been happy like this in years. Maybe ever."
likedriedflowerpetals: (neg) panic (as you surface from the dark)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-22 04:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Yoongi's laugh stills in his throat at the way Jungkook touches him, and he's torn between the instinct to close his eyes and wanting to keep them open to take in the way Jungkook looks at him. Lucky, lucky, lucky, how did two such unlucky kids get to be so fucking blessed? Like some bizarre fated way of tipping the scales back into balance and then some, down, down, down into fortune so good, no one else before knew the meaning of it. And he doesn't know, really, which side he'd be on, if he were outside of this, caught between bearing witness to something this profoundly beautiful and wanting to shield his eyes, whether because of its sanctity or its sappiness. Both. All of it.

"We're disgusting," he agrees, quietly wry, nuzzling into Jungkook's touch. "And yeah. I mean, not to be an asshole, just..." He huffs, cheeks coloring in the soft light, fingertips tracing idly back along Jungkook's skin as he speaks half into Jungkook's palm. "When you look at me... the way you look at me... like you've never seen anything so beautiful." He trusts Jungkook too much not to think there's some truth to what he sees in his expression, that pure, unguarded adoration. Even if Jungkook is (and he is) enormously biased, Yoongi must be a work of fucking art to deserve the kind of gaze leveled at him now. Like, he knows he's relatively attractive, but there's a difference between being reasonably hot and being someone who gets looked at like that.
likedriedflowerpetals: (it's like the sun came out)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-23 04:23 pm (UTC)(link)
If Yoongi were the kind to cry much, he'd cry now, probably, overcome by the sheer loveliness of being so loved. As it is, he closes his eyes and lets it sweep over him, waves of warmth and gratitude β€” toward whom, he doesn't know. Toward Jungkook, for loving him, mostly. Toward whatever brought them ineffably together. He drapes his arm across Jungkook's waist and tilts his head in search of Jungkook's lips, rolling halfway onto him as they kiss.

Some other time, he might actually ask how and why, but right now, it doesn't matter, all those edges and fears worn down by a day of basking in the feeling of being adored. Instead, he just kisses him, sweet and deep as if that in itself could be enough to convey all the things he feels.

"Never," he says, half-agreement, half-plea. "Not allowed to stop. I'll never love anyone but you."
likedriedflowerpetals: (neutral) concentrating, pensive (sometimes my mind don't shake & shift)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-28 04:23 pm (UTC)(link)
It takes a lot of work to convince Yoongi of his internal beauty β€” much more than his external, most days β€” but at times like this, it's easier to feel it's true that there's something in him worth loving. Jungkook wouldn't if there weren't. No matter how soft his heart, he couldn't just invent someone to love and then ignore everything real about Yoongi; some part of those things he loves must be there.

Even if he wanted to protest, any thought of it falls by the wayside with Jungkook's next words. Yoongi's mouth opens for him to speak, but his words tumble over themselves so quickly that, at first, nothing comes out. He just shakes his head. "No," he says, "no." It's not like it bothers him that the others chose that for themselves β€” the arrangement, anyway, not the emotions. If they're happy, he really doesn't give a fuck what that takes, as long as they're all on the same page. But for himself, it's so hard to imagine. He has a lot of love to give, if he's honest with himself, his heart bigger, softer, than he'd like, too easily bruised. But nothing else has felt like this, and he finds he hopes nothing else ever does. He doesn't want another love. He wants this, forever. "I don't think I could. I don't β€” the way I feel about you β€” I don't think I could."
likedriedflowerpetals: (neutral) concentrating, pensive (sometimes my mind don't shake & shift)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-30 06:13 am (UTC)(link)
Even so, Yoongi's heart squeezes tight in his chest with fear at the very thought of it. He's lost too much already. And he knows, some people lose more. Some people, the world takes so much, like Hoseok, without any parents at all, abandoned, alone except for them. He only lost one person, but when she left, part of him did, too. He's never going to be the same without his mother. He can only imagine for a fractured instant how lost, how broken, he'd be if anything happened to Jungkook. He's not sure he could survive another loss like that.

He hates that, hates how fragile he's become since she died. Even if he's decent at hiding it, he breaks more easily than he used to, cries more readily, pulls away too fast, afraid of everything.

Except Jungkook, Jungkook can see it. He knows and he stays.

"It better not," he whispers, gaze lowering briefly, lashes fluttering as he tries to steady himself against the very idea of it. "I need you too much. I don't ever want to be without you. Not ever again."
likedriedflowerpetals: (positive) :D (got diamonds in my eyes for you)

[personal profile] likedriedflowerpetals 2020-01-31 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Yoongi laughs, the creeping edge of melancholy ebbing away again. Jungkook is good for him, he thinks, a balm for his worries, soothing to his heart. He's better off with him, happier than he used to be. Kinder, he thinks, to himself than he once was. He leans close, pressing a kiss to Jungkook's hollowed cheek. "Definitely," he teases. "Very mature." He doubts Jungkook could pass for anything above seventeen, but the idea of it is cute, Jungkook trying to sneak into places he's not allowed just to keep an eye on him. Jealousy is oddly flattering, when it's mostly in jest.

"Please," he adds, wry, brushing a kiss against Jungkook's lips. "Like I have eyes for anyone but you." No matter how hot someone else might be, acknowledging it isn't enough to distract him from what they have. Why would he trade away the surest thing he's ever felt? Fingers brushing through Jungkook's hair, he shifts closer, lifting his chin to press a kiss to Jungkook's forehead. Yeah, other people might be objectively hotter, but it doesn't take a genius to see that Jungkook is only going to get more and more beautiful as he grows older, or that he's ridiculously lovely now. "Doesn't matter how hot these people are."

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