lovestrippedbare | 𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

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yoongi

𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

There are times, Jungkook thinks, when unexpected changes in plan work out for the best. Giving up on the idea of Busan during winter break wasn't the easiest choice at the time — Jungkook had expected it to be the highlight of their winter, and giving into the pressure of Yeongwook's blackmailing hurt on multiple levels. But distance seemed safest. Planning, biding their time, having Jungkook carefully siphon a portion of his allowance over to Yoongi for safekeeping, every passing day made the trip feel more viable again, until the two of them suddenly realized that Yoongi's birthday would be an easy occasion to leave for, and that was that.

They've picked up memories along the way. The first night Jungkook had Yoongi stay over. The first dinner together with his mother, with her offering countless thanks for helping her youngest with his studies. A trip out to a nameless beach, all seven of them together, huddled and bracing against the last of the winter winds.

Getting to March isn't as difficult as Jungkook expected it to be, and now that they're here, the wait has made everything all the sweeter.

He takes countless pictures with his camera — of their seats together on the train, of the little box meals they buy from the lady with the cart. Of the ramyeon they buy an hour later, when it's clear that the box meals are more packaging than substance.

Of Yoongi, staring out the window of the train car, a soft smile on his face.

At first, Jungkook struggled with the idea of spending much of Yoongi's birthday on the train, but the trip to Busan takes several hours at best, which would have required missing class on Friday. Seeing Yoongi's peaceful expression on the train helps to set a little of that regret to rest, as does the stifled laughter they share as they stumble down the hall to their room in the hotel.

"Hotel Elysee," Jungkook says with a flourish as he waits for Yoongi to swipe their room key. "Is that, like, French?"

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yoongi likes this part just as much as the sex, he's found, albeit in a different way. It's just nice to get to relax in Jungkook's arms, sated and loose-limbed and happy, looking at the boy he loves so much. Jungkook presses little kisses to his forehead, to his cheek, and Yoongi watches him, smiling fondly and so, so happy. Before they started dating, he knows, he wasn't nearly as content a person. He wondered too much what others really felt about him, about his place in things. He still does sometimes. With Jungkook, though, there's no doubting, no moment where he has to question this. Jungkook loves him. It feels good to be so sure of that.

"Yeah?" he asks, almost a hum, hand skimming along Jungkook's shoulder and down to his waist. It wasn't something he'd really planned on doing until he was doing it, but watching Jungkook describe it, he's glad he tried. There's still research to be done and practice, too, to be sure he's being as careful as possible, but it's reassuring to have tried and gotten it right — and looking as Jungkook, he has no doubt he really did. "It was pretty hot. There's just... something about how much you trust me. And how much you liked it." Next time, he thinks, he won't have to think so much about what he's doing and he'll enjoy it all the more for that. For now, just seeing how much Jungkook got off on it was hot enough in its own right. Yoongi won't forget the way Jungkook pressed at his hand, encouraging him to hold his throat all the tighter.

There's always a bit of warring in Jungkook's mind between wanting to clean himself up and wanting to savor the afterglow. It won't be long before their skin turns clammy, and come isn't exactly pleasant once it's drying. But when Jungkook closes his eyes, the scale seems to tip much more easily in favor of staying in bed — the sheets will get changed tomorrow morning anyway, and there's something heady about smelling sex all over Yoongi. With his vision still obscured, Jungkook traces his fingertips along the curve of Yoongi's shoulder, back to the shoulder blades, down along his spine, enjoying all the freedom of touch and movement that he had been denied only minutes before.

"I wouldn't have been able to do it with anyone else," Jungkook muses to himself. "I won't want to do it with anyone else, ever. It's... I don't know, it's still probably kind of messed up that I like this stuff, right? It's not just about the head rush, though. I think some of why I like it so much is — when it gets hard to breathe, you start seeing all of these sparks at the corner of your vision. So many colors that you can't get by painting on canvas. And then things start to seem darker, but it's not scary, it's... kind of like that moment before you fall asleep. So you're lying there, and you're so turned on, but you're also calm and you know that no matter what happens, the last thing you'll see right then is the face of the person you love most."

He turns, blindly seeking out Yoongi's lips, hitting them slightly off-center with a kiss.

It feels like something Jungkook needs to work out for himself aloud, but that doesn't stop Yoongi from having something to say about it. He leans in, meeting Jungkook's kiss first, hand wandering along his back. Pressed close together like this, he's at once all too aware of the state they're in and too comfortable to do anything about it. There's a lot to unpack about what Jungkook says, and Yoongi wonders briefly if he'd enjoy it himself; when Jungkook describes it, it mostly sounds nice, almost peaceful. But he knows himself well enough to be reasonably certain he'd just start panicking instead of being able to relax into it, and that would spoil the whole thing. Better to leave it to Jungkook, better to learn how to do it right to give him that experience.

"As long as you're careful," he says. "If it's too much, you have to stop me." More than that, he needs to learn how to recognize it for himself. It occurs to him belatedly that he wouldn't know what going too far looks like, and, if he'd crossed that point, Jungkook might not have been able to tell him. He reminds himself that he didn't, that it's fine. He has to put the same faith in Jungkook that the younger places in him. "And it's not — there's nothing messed up about it, okay?" Plenty of people get off on things just as dangerous, if not more so, even if that isn't the aspect Jungkook seems to be into. Jungkook's hardly the only person in the world who likes to be choked, and Yoongi will be damned if he lets Jungkook think less of himself for something that is, at worst, simply uncommon. "Just because not everyone likes it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with it. As long as we're safe and we're enjoying it, I don't see a problem."

Jungkook hums skeptically when Yoongi insists that there's nothing wrong with having such a fetish. However glad Jungkook is that his boyfriend is willing to try just about anything that pleases Jungkook, there's a part of him that won't ever feel quite normal given his proclivities, Jungkook thinks. It's not normal to want to put oneself in a dangerous position. Not normal for there to need to be a safe word to stop them from going too far. It's a level beyond the unease that Jungkook already felt about the fact that he wasn't only attracted to girls — at least there, he can rightfully point out that all good people are deserving of love. But asphyxiation and bondage feel irrational.

"Well... if it ever makes you feel uncomfortable, you have to let me know, okay?" Jungkook asks, trying to stem the flicker of doubt that passes through his chest, wondering in retrospect if Yoongi was uncomfortable. Or if he would be, had they gone further than they did. Biting his lower lip, Jungkook shifts, pulling Yoongi closer still, wrapping his arms securely around the elder's shoulders. "I should've. Should've made sure you were totally okay with it just now, I — it was so nice that I stopped thinking."

Something about that takes Yoongi by surprise, his eyes widening briefly. He's so quick to check in with Jungkook, to be sure that he's happy and cared for and comfortable. He forgets to check in with himself. Part of it is that it's so instinctive just to do what's going to make Jungkook happy, but, he thinks, mostly it's that he gets so caught up in what they're doing, it doesn't occur to him to stop. That in itself seems like a good sign, though. If he'd really been bothered, it would have been enough to cut through the enjoyment.

He traces small, gentle patterns against Jungkook's back, lifting his head to press a kiss to his forehead. "I'm okay with it," he says. "I want to do some research before we try it again, but it's okay." It might not be his kink, but it's not like he finds it upsetting either, and it makes Jungkook happy. That seems like reason enough to give it another go some time. "I think I'll be more comfortable when I'm sure I know what I'm doing. And you..." He huffs out a soft laugh, fond. "I don't expect you to be doing a lot of thinking when you're tied up and getting fucked like that. You're not supposed to have to think at that point." He is. He's the one who should be on top of these things. When he ties Jungkook up like that, when Jungkook gives up all control, he also takes away his need to have to think about these things. He's pretty sure that's part of the pleasure of it.

"Yeah, that's — that's true, I guess," Jungkook chuckles, gaze skirting down again, bashful and shy. There's no doubt in Jungkook's mind that part of what makes being submissive appealing is the ceding of control, of having someone else choose the path for him. Still, Jungkook knows that he wasn't exactly as passive just now as he should have been — he has a hard time holding back with the way he vocalizes, has a hard time keeping himself from expressing all of the things that he wants. Even now, without so many words, Jungkook finds himself nuzzling as best he can against Yoongi's cheek, seeking comfort.

Jungkook's pretty sure he'll never quite be able to stop himself from expressing those desires, so it's important for Yoongi to know that they never have to tread that path at all, if Yoongi isn't comfortable doing so.

"Just promise me anyway," Jungkook murmurs after a pause. "That if it ever makes you uncomfortable, you'll stop. We'll stop. There's like, a million and one other things we can do together that I find just as hot, so. I wanna make sure you're having a good time, too."

It's a small laugh, but it's a laugh nonetheless, enough to make Yoongi smile, relieved. This is the kind of thing they really do need to talk about, he knows that, and he wants to, however awkward he might be at it. But he also doesn't want Jungkook to feel bad, especially right on the heels of having felt so good. If he can make him laugh even a little bit, that makes it a lot easier to continue.

"I promise," he says, quietly solemn. "I'm not..." He sighs, fumbling for the right words, to put his thoughts in order. "If I feel like I might be hurting you — not in a fun way — I can't do that. I'm not gonna do that. I promise I'll stop if I'm not enjoying it." And, as far as he can remember, he's never been faced with that dilemma. Even when they've done things that weren't necessarily his kinks, he can't say he hasn't enjoyed them. Hell, he didn't think he was into any kind of bondage before they started sleeping together, but it turns out that sex with Jungkook is helping him to discover all kinds of new things about himself. And there's a lot Yoongi doesn't like about himself, but he refuses to feel guilty or wrong for doing things that make them both feel good.

"I wasn't uncomfortable," he adds after a moment. "Or... a little. But mostly because I don't know what I'm doing and it made me kinda nervous. But you looked like you liked it and it was hot and I just got caught up in it." His cheeks are hot as he says it, a faint embarrassment making his chest tight as he talks it out, as much for his own sake as for Jungkook's. "I guess that's what makes me uncomfortable. Not you or what you want." One of them should be in control. It's supposed to be him. If he lets go completely, too, what's to keep him from fucking up in a way that gets one of them hurt?

"At least I'm not really in it for the pain," Jungkook jokes with a small grin, fumbling briefly with his hands, holding them restlessly against his own chest. "Not that there's anything wrong if someone is, but — if it really started to hurt, I'd definitely let you know. So you don't really have to worry about that." Even though this topic is far from a gentle one, the feelings Jungkook experiences when Yoongi describes the effect the intimacy had on him are nothing but soft, soft, soft. Even when the both of them are caught in the midst of passion, Jungkook thinks, there's always so much of Yoongi's heart and mind that's reserved for making sure that Jungkook is safe and well. Almost as though Yoongi's own self-preservation depends on Jungkook's well-being.

He's not sure that there's anyone else in the world who's felt similarly about him. Even Jungkook's mother isn't quite that attuned to her son, Jungkook thinks. It takes her a lot to notice when something's wrong with her son, and even more time to wheedle the truth out of him. For Yoongi, it seems intuitive.

So maybe it isn't the worst thing in the world that Jungkook didn't ask when Yoongi placed that hand against his throat.

"Maybe we can... watch a video together sometime?" Jungkook asks, wondering aloud. "See if there are things that other people do make sure that it's safe. Though I'm guessing that I'm probably pretty tame compared to most."

Yoongi runs his hand along Jungkook's arm, reaching for Jungkook's hand to pull against his chest, absently bringing him close to feel the way, even now, Yoongi's heartbeat races for him. He smiles and he nods and he leans closer to give Jungkook a soft kiss. If Jungkook did want to be hurt, Yoongi's not sure that's something he could do, even for Jungkook. That he doesn't makes all of this a lot easier. A little pain heightens the pleasure, and Yoongi's not opposed to that, but he's seen, in brief glimpses, what other people do. That's fine for them, but he has no interest.

The idea of watching porn with Jungkook, though, that's interesting. It's not the first time Jungkook's suggested it, but it strikes Yoongi as a particularly good idea now.

"That's good, though," he says. "If it works for people who are... less tame, then it'll help us be safe, too, right?" Yeah, he knows, porn stars have a full crew around them to make sure everyone's safe (at least, he hopes they do. He hasn't given the production value much thought either), but they still have to know what they're doing. Not that he usually watches that kind of thing for its instructional value — though he has to admit there have been exceptions, even after Seokjin warned him against it, but it's not like he can go to Jin like Okay, so we're good at the sex part, but how do I go about eating out Jungkook? when Jin would have to still look them in the eye later — but, but, in this case, he can see how it would be useful to them. He gives Jungkook's hand a squeeze. "And I don't know, watching it together... might find some other stuff we wanna try."

"I think so?" Jungkook muses. Porn isn't always the most realistic, Jungkook knows, but a part of him has to hope that when it comes to situations like this, that a film crew would be a bit more responsible, not wanting to portray something that might get people killed if they try to imitate the video. Maybe that's placing too much faith in porn though, Jungkook muses a moment later. Part of the appeal of porn for people is that it's fantasy — that they can escape into a world that isn't anything like their own, where every detail is curated to maximize pleasure. Sex isn't nearly as neat as porn makes it out to be.

But Jungkook finds that he likes the real thing all the more for it — perfect in all of its imperfection.

When Yoongi mentions the possibility of sparking other ideas, Jungkook tilts his head thoughtfully, watching Yoongi even as his hand continues to smooth over Yoongi's chest, seeking out the steady pulse. "Are there... kinks that you haven't told me about? Or things that you're now thinking of trying?" Jungkook asks, eyes wide and curious. "Like. Eating me out, for one."

God help him, Yoongi blushes, coloring immediately, as if saying the words is somehow awful in a way the action itself wasn't. "I was curious," he says, a hint of defensiveness in it although there's nothing mocking or accusatory in Jungkook's tone, only curiosity of his own. There is, he knows, no reason to be embarrassed about the things he wants to do. Jungkook has never given him reason to be, for one. Sometimes, though, it isn't as easy to avoid that feeling of shame that comes with talking about sex as it is to think that he shouldn't feel it.

He takes a moment to think, breathing slow and deep, feeling the way Jungkook's hand rises and falls with his chest. Moving together, always together. "I don't know," he says, which doesn't actually mean he doesn't know so much as it does that he's gathering his thoughts. "I like pretty much everything we've done. Didn't think I'd be that into tying you up, but..." It had intrigued him immediately, he can't deny that, but it's not like he'd thought much about it before. Now, what Jungkook said earlier about trying other kinds of knots and such proves exciting. "I don't know that I'm into anything all that kinky other than that. I've thought about fucking you from behind, but I think I might miss looking at you too much." Which, he thinks, is somehow one of the sappiest things he's ever said.

Thoughtful, he brushes his fingers through Jungkook's hair where it threatens to fall into his eyes. "Still want you to fuck me some time. And I liked today. Being in public. I mean, it was kind of terrifying, but in a good way."

"I'm glad you were curious," Jungkook says immediately, sensing the hint of embarrassment in Yoongi's tone. He closes his eyes, nothing but contentment in his smile. Even if it had been a surprise, Jungkook likes what the rimming indicated — that Yoongi thinks about the two of them and their intimacy. Jungkook may not have had any reasons to doubt that Yoongi would, but the confirmation is nice nonetheless. It makes Jungkook feel attractive in a way that words alone probably couldn't. He shifts closer on the bed, doing his best to lock their bodies closer together, an endless tangle of limbs and skin still damp with sweat.

"And fucking from behind sounds totally interesting," Jungkook adds, beaming as he smiles half at Yoongi, half at the ceiling, as though it might spill out into a sky of endless possibilities. "If you end up missing me too much, we can always stop halfway and flip me over. But it could be, well — the angle will be different, and that's definitely interesting, and sometimes when you can't see it kinda forces you to focus on everything else, right?"

Idly, Jungkook reaches his hand down, kneading at Yoongi's ass, still warmer to the touch from sex. "And I will definitely fuck you some time. And suck you off in public again. Because yeah, it was scary, but — god, it was so hot knowing what we were getting away with. Seeing you try so hard to stay silent, fuck."

Watching Jungkook, the way he smiles now, so satisfied, so happy, all Yoongi can do is relax into his touch, willing his mind to follow suit. It's so easy to second-guess himself, so easy to doubt. He forgets again and again that, when he makes himself voice that, Jungkook is always there to soften the worry and set him right. It's ridiculous to be embarrassed by much of anything at this point. They're a mess of sweat and limbs and each other's bodily fluids; there's nothing they can't share.

Even so, he ducks his head at Jungkook's words, viscerally reminded of earlier, how he'd struggled to keep quiet so no one would catch them. He's usually careful, knowing the last thing he needs is to get caught by his dad, but this was something else entirely, the risk even higher, the thrill even greater. "God, you too," he says, barely an exhale. "That was... really hot. And, yeah, let's try that sometime, from behind. Worst that happens is we don't like it as much." He strokes his hand slowly up and down Jungkook's side as he talks, watching him. There's something weirdly sweet about Jungkook when he's like this. He's just so excited and curious, and it helps coax Yoongi to meet him halfway there. He shrugs. "I don't know. I feel like I'm still figuring things out, but I like trying things with you."

"I'm pretty sure I'd enjoy just about any type of sex with you," Jungkook says flatly, letting out a soft sigh when Yoongi's palm starts to travel further up his side. It's the kind of touch that's practically thoughtless — just another reminder of how easily the two of them are drawn to one another, how comfortable it is simply to have Yoongi near. "Even stuff that we don't like as much is probably still the best thing ever when it's with you. Like beach sex with all the sand — bet it'd still be the best. Even if we tried something and didn't get it right the first time, it'd still be good. Min Yoongi can do no wrong."

Perhaps his claims are getting more outlandish by the second, aided by that constant rush of serotonin, but if there's a time to be foolishly in love, this weekend seems to be it. Jungkook takes a moment to wriggle, settling deeper against the sheets and barely suppressing the desire to wrinkle his nose over the clamminess of their skin. Instead, he reaches up to trace Yoongi's features with his fingertips, lingering by the curve of his lashes, the corner of his smile.

"I don't think I've ever been happier than I am today," Jungkook murmurs.

Absurd as it is, Yoongi grins, almost laughs. Jungkook might be exaggerating, but it pleases him all the same, and, besides, there's a kernel of truth in it. Even if something they try doesn't work out, the trying would probably be fun in itself. It's exploring each other that's so good and exciting about sex. As much as he enjoys the rush of the act itself, he doubts it would feel half as good without the connection they have. His smile stretches his cheeks, pressing against the soft touch of Jungkook's fingers, and he turns his head to give a quick kiss to his palm.

It feels right now like he has everything he could ever want. Hand skimming back down to the small of Jungkook's back, he leans closer, presses their foreheads gently together. "Me either," he says, soft. "I love you so much." There's nothing here but them — no school pressure, no parents to ignore or hurt them, nothing but the way their bodies feel tangled together like this, the gentleness of Jungkook's touch and voice. There's just something about being together like this that seems to clear away the shadows in his head, leaving him calm and content in a way he can't remember being before they started dating.

Jungkook's dreamed of love for a long time. It's hard not to. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that he spent so many years poring through old photo albums, fingers gently brushing along the edges of pictures taken of his parents when they were young, fresh-faced, eagerly anticipating the rest of their lives together. Jungkook's stepfather is, well — he's fine for Jungkook's mom, he really is, but Jungkook likes to think that it was his father who was really her true love, as sad as that might be for her. It's still something, Jungkook thinks, for her to have had that consuming kind of love. All that Jungkook's ever wanted for himself was to find that same kind of love, something to ease the loneliness he often felt within his home.

But the real thing is so much more than smiles. Jungkook feels it in his every breath, in the flush that spreads through his cheeks, the tingle of excitement that sparks across his skin. Being with Yoongi is both electrifying and calming at once, the excitement of knowing that he's finally whole now that he's found his better half.

His mother would laugh at him for thinking so, but Jungkook can't help but sense in his gut that Yoongi is the one he'll be loving for the rest of his life. They fit too well together for that not to be the case.

"Gonna marry you someday," Jungkook murmurs, pleased with the thought as he closes his eyes and enjoys the weight of Yoongi's forehead against his own. "Just you wait."

Yoongi can only imagine what people would say if they knew how sure he and Jungkook are of each other. Even if his father accepted that he was in love with another boy, Yoongi knows he'd tell him he's too young to think of marriage. And maybe for other teenagers, that's true. Lots of his peers are too young and flighty for this. They might love deeply, but they aren't ready to think of commitment in these terms. But when Yoongi thinks of the rest of his life, this is what he wants — not some bright generic forever, but a lifetime of moments tangled up in each other, or like in his kitchen when his father's gone for the day, the two of them cooking, or coming back from the shower to find Jungkook doing the laundry. A hundred tiny things, all the little tokens of domesticity. A home.

Their home will never be silent, he thinks. Even when it's quiet, it will always be music.

"What if I don't want to wait?" he asks softly. He's pretty sure, at times like this, the only things stopping them from just eloping are that their marriage isn't legal yet and that their friends would kill them. "Just wanna be with you."

No matter how straight Jungkook tries to keep his expression, his cheeks give him away immediately, flooding over with heat. It's a nice thought, imagining the two of them getting married right now. Even this trip has a certain elopement-like quality to it, just the two of them, away even from the brothers they love most at home. Jungkook worries briefly at his lower lip before he reaches out for Yoongi's hand, thumbing the ring on Yoongi's pinky finger. It's certainly not the first time they've talked about marriage, so it's almost embarrassing how much more Jungkook's mind runs away with the idea now.

"You're already gonna be with me," Jungkook points out, finally giving in to temptation and sliding Yoongi's ring off of his pinky finger, then nudging it halfway up his ring finger. It's not perfect, but the image still takes a bit of his breath away. "The other hyungs already got mad that I stole you away for your birthday, though. If we got hitched, they'd disown us or something."

He glances up at Yoongi, a crooked grin on his lips. "In my heart, I'm already yours anyway. Doesn't matter whether or not it's official with the government."

The room swims a little, hazy, as Jungkook moves his ring. It's not even the real thing, not even a ring big enough to fit on his finger all the way, not quite there, and yet — his breath hitches and he's not sure he even realized just how much he really does want that. And Yoongi knows, because he spends a lot of time in his own head, that it's probably all tangled up in his own parents' marriage. The way that, no matter how things ended, there were times when they seemed so happy, they'd almost shine. It wasn't a perfect marriage, but it had its moments, and that's what Yoongi's found himself clinging to over the years, like proof that true love and happiness are possible. But mostly it's to do with this, the way Jungkook looks at him, the way Yoongi's heart flutters when he does.

So he leans close and kisses him, hand lifting to Jungkook's cheek, slow and tender and deep. "In my heart," he echoes, agreeing. How any of it will fall into place as they get older, he doesn't know. He doesn't think he expects the government to catch up with them any time soon, and their parents are something altogether more difficult to get around, but all of that matters less when Jungkook says things like that. In their hearts, they're as good as married, and not much else matters. "But we're still gonna do it for real someday."

"Yeah we are," Jungkook agrees, letting out a pleased little exhale before he tilts his head up yet again, seeing out a kiss, tasting each become sweeter than the last. Hearing that confirmation from Yoongi puts Jungkook's heart at ease, somehow. The hows and whens of getting married feel less important than knowing that Yoongi's just as eager to tie the knot as Jungkook is. "The real question is, who's gonna be the officiant? Namjoon hyung's probably the smartest... but he might turn the speech into some hour-long thing. Seokjin hyung wouldn't be able to stop telling jokes. And Tae's gotta be my best man."

Jungkook can't help but chuckle at the thought, suddenly shy again as he turns towards Yoongi and hides his face against the side of Yoongi's neck. There's something intoxicating about suddenly feeling free to express all of his hopes and dreams in a way that he never had the chance to at home. Back in Seoul, each day passes with an undercurrent of stress, Jungkook constantly trying to figure out a way to meet his parent's expectations without making himself miserable in the process. Out here, what they want for him doesn't seem to matter. Out here, no one will judge him for thinking more about a wedding ceremony than about his exams.

"Won't be too long, right? We'll probably be married in like... three years. Once I'm twenty and everything."

Three years seems like a long time to wait, but Yoongi nods anyway. Jungkook will need to turn twenty before they can really carry through and, anyway, they'll want to get settled in university and be able to find somewhere to live. They'll probably need jobs, too, on top of school, because, even here, in this quiet, contented space, he can't hide from the certainty that his father will disown him once he's out.

But that's something for future Yoongi to worry about. Now Yoongi has Jungkook's lips brushing whisper-soft against his skin as he talks, his body warm and sweet against Yoongi's, weaving dreams out of thin air. It feels good to hear Jungkook talk like this. He's never been what Yoongi would call closed off, but it's as if something has come unlatched in him now, left him swinging wide open.

"Well, we'll either have to set a time-limit for Namjoon," he muses, "or tell Seokjin that if he tells more than three terrible jokes, we're kicking him out mid-ceremony. We'll let Hoseok take over."

"Maybe they'll all want to say something anyway," Jungkook laughs, conjuring up the mental image of each of the other five taking turns stepping into the center. He can't imagine that they'll have that many people at the wedding anyway, so maybe there isn't a point in having an officiant — maybe it's enough to have each one of the boys say their piece. Maybe it's fine if some of them want to go on a little longer; with Taehyung's level of patience, Jungkook imagines none of them would be allowed to drag things out beyond a few minutes each. "It'll be a round robin sort of deal. They'll each give their blessing and we'll make out in the middle of the circle."

With a contented sigh, Jungkook rolls onto his back again, eyes heavily lidded as he lets himself slowly take in Yoongi's features, from the soft smile on his lips to the tousled strands of his hair.

"Things are so perfect right now," Jungkook murmurs. "I never thought... that my life was that bad. I guess I was sad after my dad passed away, but — you know, I figured I was lucky because my mom remarried and it was easier to afford things again. School's kinda boring, but it's not terrible, 'specially after I found all of you. But now it's like... I dunno. Things are so much better. I'm just happy."

Yoongi laughs, and he is soft, soft, soft, fond from his eyes to his toes, thinking of Jungkook holding his hands and kissing him the way he does, surrounded by their friends, who'll laugh at them and throw sand maybe and jeer, but all of it with so much love.

Jungkook says he didn't think his life was bad, though Yoongi disagrees, would still save him from it if he could. Yoongi knows his own isn't what it should be, that he's grieved too big a loss for his age, for any age, and that his father is no help to him. But they have their friends, this perfect little family, and they have each other, and some days — most days, when he's feeling alright, which is a lot lately — that feels like enough to call himself lucky anyway.

He leans on his side, gazing down at Jungkook, head propped on one hand as the other traces a line slowly down Jungkook's chest. They should shower, but this moment is too peaceful to disrupt. "That's all I want," he says. "To make you happy. That I get to be any part of that..." He hates ever to mention the way his brain so often betrays them, let alone at a moment like this, but he can't just pretend it away either, shrugging. "Even with the others around, I don't think I've been happy like this in years. Maybe ever."

"We're so sappy," Jungkook laughs, groaning as he lifts a hand to block his eyes. Maybe they feel a little bit warmer, wetter than they usually do, but if that's the case, he's certainly not going to admit as such to Yoongi. He finds it interesting, how the way his heart aches during happiness and sadness are so similar, like there's never quite enough to fill the space of his heart. "Ugh, it's super gross. No wonder the others don't want to be around us when we're like this."

Jungkook pulls in a small breath as Yoongi traces his fingers down the line of Jungkook's chest. Wonders, briefly, if Yoongi can sense how Jungkook's feeling now, vulnerable and fragile and unbreakable all at once. Maybe it's a good thing they retreated when they did. Jungkook could spend days in this room alone, he thinks, without tiring of it.

"Same here, though. I've never been this happy," Jungkook murmurs, expression softening as he traces Yoongi's features with his fingertips, brushing invisible lines, marveling at how the curves and sharp edges meld so well. "You're really beautiful, you know that?"

Yoongi's laugh stills in his throat at the way Jungkook touches him, and he's torn between the instinct to close his eyes and wanting to keep them open to take in the way Jungkook looks at him. Lucky, lucky, lucky, how did two such unlucky kids get to be so fucking blessed? Like some bizarre fated way of tipping the scales back into balance and then some, down, down, down into fortune so good, no one else before knew the meaning of it. And he doesn't know, really, which side he'd be on, if he were outside of this, caught between bearing witness to something this profoundly beautiful and wanting to shield his eyes, whether because of its sanctity or its sappiness. Both. All of it.

"We're disgusting," he agrees, quietly wry, nuzzling into Jungkook's touch. "And yeah. I mean, not to be an asshole, just..." He huffs, cheeks coloring in the soft light, fingertips tracing idly back along Jungkook's skin as he speaks half into Jungkook's palm. "When you look at me... the way you look at me... like you've never seen anything so beautiful." He trusts Jungkook too much not to think there's some truth to what he sees in his expression, that pure, unguarded adoration. Even if Jungkook is (and he is) enormously biased, Yoongi must be a work of fucking art to deserve the kind of gaze leveled at him now. Like, he knows he's relatively attractive, but there's a difference between being reasonably hot and being someone who gets looked at like that.

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