lovestrippedbare | 𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

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yoongi

𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

There are times, Jungkook thinks, when unexpected changes in plan work out for the best. Giving up on the idea of Busan during winter break wasn't the easiest choice at the time — Jungkook had expected it to be the highlight of their winter, and giving into the pressure of Yeongwook's blackmailing hurt on multiple levels. But distance seemed safest. Planning, biding their time, having Jungkook carefully siphon a portion of his allowance over to Yoongi for safekeeping, every passing day made the trip feel more viable again, until the two of them suddenly realized that Yoongi's birthday would be an easy occasion to leave for, and that was that.

They've picked up memories along the way. The first night Jungkook had Yoongi stay over. The first dinner together with his mother, with her offering countless thanks for helping her youngest with his studies. A trip out to a nameless beach, all seven of them together, huddled and bracing against the last of the winter winds.

Getting to March isn't as difficult as Jungkook expected it to be, and now that they're here, the wait has made everything all the sweeter.

He takes countless pictures with his camera — of their seats together on the train, of the little box meals they buy from the lady with the cart. Of the ramyeon they buy an hour later, when it's clear that the box meals are more packaging than substance.

Of Yoongi, staring out the window of the train car, a soft smile on his face.

At first, Jungkook struggled with the idea of spending much of Yoongi's birthday on the train, but the trip to Busan takes several hours at best, which would have required missing class on Friday. Seeing Yoongi's peaceful expression on the train helps to set a little of that regret to rest, as does the stifled laughter they share as they stumble down the hall to their room in the hotel.

"Hotel Elysee," Jungkook says with a flourish as he waits for Yoongi to swipe their room key. "Is that, like, French?"

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That, Yoongi thinks, is a pretty good reason to tie Jungkook like this more often, giving him more reach. The feeling of fingers in his hair is so good, somehow at once soothing and arousing. Those things so often seem all tangled together with Jungkook, which Yoongi figures is how things should be. He's mussed and aching with need, every soft moan and gasp sending shockwaves of desire straight through him, and still, he's more comfortable here in this unfamiliar room than he's been nearly anywhere else in a long time. There's nowhere in the world safer for him than wherever Jungkook is.

"You feel pretty fucking good yourself," he says, glancing up, eyes heavy-lidded, working another finger into him. "So hot, practically fucking yourself on my fingers like that." It won't be very long, he's pretty sure, before Jungkook is ready for him, which is a relief; he's almost painfully hard, desperate to be inside of him, longing for release and for the intimacy of burying himself deep in Jungkook. His cock practically jumps at the thought. As much as he likes to tease and get Jungkook all worked up, he has no intention of keeping him waiting for long. Or himself, for that matter, wanting a real taste of him. He lowers his head again, taking Jungkook into his mouth, moaning softly. It won't do to get him off just yet, not when Yoongi wants him coming around his cock, but he's come to love the familiar taste and weight, taking him slow and deep.

"Ah, ah Min-ah, yes, like that," Jungkook breathes, eyelids fluttering shut as Yoongi works another finger inside, stretching Jungkook. There's a slight burn that comes with the movement, but Jungkook doesn't mind — if anything, the pain feels like something tangible to hold onto, something that's proof of the two of them binding closer and closer together. Gradually, he blinks his eyes open again, watching Yoongi, his mouth agape as he watches Yoongi's lips sink over his cock. He gasps then, the breath fading into a deep moan as his heels dig against the bedsheets.

Years ago, he had wondered about physical intimacy, small and shy in the darkness of his room as he watched videos in fascination. It had all seemed so complicated, so messy and uncomfortable — Jungkook couldn't quite imagine enjoying the act itself, couldn't imagine it being any better than how things felt when he worked himself. Now he thinks he understands — with their limbs tangled up in the sheets like this, they practically feel like one.

And being close to Yoongi is so much more satisfying than anything else Jungkook's known.

"God, I don't know — don't know what I want more. Your mouth, your hands, your cock," Jungkook laughs when he manages to catch a breath, sighing as he arches off the bed, back curved as though it, too, is drawn to Yoongi through some gravitational pull. "All of it."

There's such a brightness in Jungkook's voice, a mingling of delight and desperation, that Yoongi can't help if his mouth slackens a bit, stretches into a smile instead. Even now, he's so cute. Yoongi's not sure Jungkook would entirely appreciate the sentiment, however complimentary he means it to be, so he keeps it to himself. The way his heart spills over with affection, though, he can't restrain, letting out a small, happy moan around Jungkook. Easing back, he turns his head, wipes his mouth against his arm. "All of it," he says. "Oh, you're getting all of it. Wanna be inside you so bad, Gguk-ah."

Looking up at him now, Yoongi takes him in, the messy hair, the flushed cheeks and bright eyes, the way he writhes against the sheets when Yoongi's fingers get deep enough. He twists his wrist slightly, scissors his fingers apart. "So hot like this," he murmurs encouragingly. "So good for me. Think you need another?" As much as he aches for attention, he does his best to be patient. This isn't something to rush through. It's not like they haven't hurried through it, taking whatever chances they can get, but even then, Yoongi knows the importance of prepping Jungkook thoroughly. If there's any pain to be had here, it should only be for the purpose of highlighting the pleasure. He ducks his head, nipping at Jungkook's thigh, and it's all he can do not to rock his hips against the bed, every small sound spilling from Jungkook leaving him dizzy and wanting.

If Jungkook needed it, he knows that Yoongi would take things achingly slow, denying himself however long is necessary to make sure that he can spare Jungkook any discomfort or pain. But there's an equal and opposite momentum on Jungkook's end, he thinks — a deep urge to meet Yoongi's every need, to be better, ambition seeping through even to the most intimate of moments between them. So when Yoongi asks if Jungkook needs another, he shakes his head quickly, eyes wide and bright, eager to please, wanting the closeness more than he ever worries about the consequences.

"I think I'm — I'm good, I'm ready," he insists, eyes fluttering to a close again as Yoongi's fingers brush precariously close to that spot they've both come to know well. Jungkook shudders, muscles in his body tensing until he reminds himself to relax; that however much he might want to heighten sensation for Yoongi, Yoongi will also be watching to make sure he doesn't hurt Jungkook. Any hitch in breath, any sudden jolt in Jungkook's body, these are things that might easily worry Yoongi and pull them out of the moment.

"Want you inside me," Jungkook breathes, relaxing as he opens his eyes, heavily lidded and irises blown dark. "Please."

There isn't a thing in the world Yoongi wouldn't do for Jungkook. That please, so needy and sweet, gets right under his skin, like every inch of him is pulsing with the way his own desire meets his longing to give Jungkook exactly what he wants. He almost asks again, asks if he's sure, but the way Jungkook sounds right now, he doesn't think he needs to. His eyes are dark, his cheeks flushed, and, for a moment, Yoongi's throat goes tight, vaguely overwhelmed by everything — by how beautiful Jungkook is like this, spread out for him and desperate, by how much he wants without yet getting any relief, by the headiness of knowing no one here gives a shit what they're doing, that no one's going to find or stop them. There's no need to hold back here, to be careful in case his father comes home unexpectedly or wakes up. There's just them, just this, just Jungkook.

Still, he waits, slowing the pace of his fingers, until Jungkook feels more relaxed around them, before pulling them out. However badly he might want, the last thing he intends to do is hurt Jungkook. "I love you," he murmurs, briefly stroking a hand down Jungkook's thigh, the other reaching for the lube. His breath catches at the touch of his own hand, coming out again in a shaky exhale. It doesn't do much to take the edge off, just makes him wants to be inside of Jungkook even more, head light with it as he leans forward. "Love you so much." There have been times he's wondered if he says it too much, too needy himself, too anxious to be loved back as wholeheartedly as he loves; meeting Jungkook's gaze, though, he knows that isn't the case. Even if there were such a thing as too much for love, he thinks, they both crave it too much to tire of hearing it when they feel so goddamn lucky to be loved by each other in the first place. Besides, if there's ever a time for it, it's now. Yoongi hisses between his teeth, lining himself up with Jungkook's entrance and pressing slowly inside him, his heart stuttering in his chest as the tight heat envelops him. "Fuck," he whines, leaning forward to rest his head against Jungkook's shoulder. "Oh. Fuck, feel so fucking good, Gguk."

Jungkook nearly forgets to breathe as Yoongi presses inside — slow, tortuously slow, but then he's there and the two of them are together, the two of them at rest as one. Shifting to reach Yoongi is difficult, but Jungkook manages somehow to skate his lips against Yoongi's cheek. The weight of Yoongi's forehead against his shoulder is comforting, like Jungkook is reliable, like Jungkook is there for no other reason than to be Yoongi's. Love you so much, the words echo in Jungkook's ears, and somehow it's both hard to believe and the most obvious truth at once. Every touch of Yoongi's seems steeped in it, this adoration that shields Jungkook from all other thought.

"Love you," Jungkook mumbles, the words slipping out between moans, little staccatos in the midst of their melody. "Love you, love you, love you."

And Yoongi will undoubtedly be careful with Jungkook, as he always is, never wanting there to be any unnecessary pain. But even with all the reassurance in the world, and with the luxury of all the time they suddenly have on their hands, still Jungkook remains impatient to please and eager to feel. He doesn't wait for his body to fully acclimate, whimpering as he tries to pivot his hips and drive himself further down on Yoongi's cock. Distantly, Jungkook wonders how desperate he must look, his throat already dry for the way he's breathing heavily between parted lips, his gaze slightly unfocused. "Fuck me," Jungkook gasps, voice reedy — he understands why they call this making love. "Yoongi-ah, fuck me, love me."

The way Jungkook presses down against him draws a sharp hiss from Yoongi. That in itself is hard to resist, but when he hears those words in his ear, it's all he can do to hold back a moment longer. Restraining himself to small, shallow thrusts takes almost more will power than he has, when all he wants is to give Jungkook what he wants, to drive into Jungkook again and again, hard and deep and fast, until the younger boy is completely wrecked around his cock.

But if he does that right away, he's pretty sure he'll come too fast. Besides, he wants to enjoy this a little longer, propping himself up a bit to get a better look at Jungkook — who, admittedly, already looks pretty damn wrecked. Irises blown dark and sweat on his brow, he's desperately beautiful as Yoongi runs a hand along his hip. He hooks it beneath Jungkook's thigh, tugging him closer, shifting the angle. "Thought I was the one in charge," he says, a low, teasing growl. Fuck, he looks good like this, practically begging for more. Yoongi relents a little, fucking him deeper, as much for himself as for Jungkook's sake. "Want me to fuck you? Like this? Or do you want it harder?" He's pretty sure he could answer that himself, and, frankly, he's not sure he can keep up the tease for long anyway, aching to go faster. Still, he likes to hear it from Jungkook himself, likes the way he looks when he begs, needy and whining and gorgeous. Besides, he knows Jungkook gets off on this anyway, that he likes being controlled as much as Yoongi likes being in control. It's just another of the infinite ways they complement each other, a matching set with pieces made to fit, interlocked and whole only when united. Sure that Jungkook will keep his leg hooked around Yoongi on his own, he lets go, smoothing his hand along Jungkook's chest to tweak his nipple instead. "Faster?"

Even though on some level, Jungkook knows that Yoongi is teasing, he can't help the deep flush that spreads across his cheeks when Yoongi reprimands him for being so needy. For trying to give direction when he should be submitting. And when Yoongi gives the reminder, voice low and gravelly, Jungkook can't help the whine that slips through his lips, nails dragging against Yoongi's skin as Jungkook twists, wanting to feel closer, closer, closer. Wanting to feel Yoongi's growl reverberate through his body.

"I — want whatever you want," Jungkook pants, even though the keen of his voice makes it clear what he wants, shivering as Yoongi starts to drive himself deeper and faster. "I — oh, fuck, mm." Jungkook bites down harshly on his lip, and even if he doesn't give a single word of direction, Jungkook's pretty sure that Yoongi knows exactly what he wants. His body betrays him, shuddering as Yoongi drives himself in deeper, faster, and Jungkook whines as he pivots his hips to make for easier access. The dichotomy is a heady one, Yoongi filling him full to burst, but Jungkook's cock going untouched and neglected, until even the slightest brush of the tip against Yoongi's abdomen makes Jungkook cry out, head falling back against the pillow.

"Y-yes," he stammers, another gasp slipping free as Yoongi pinches his nipple. "Yes, Yoongi, fuck. You feel so good, so good, love how you use me, s'everything I want—"

Jungkook bites the inside of his cheek again, wondering if he's said too much. Most of the time, he finds that silence is far too high of a bar for him to meet, but he does his best now, blinking and staring up at Yoongi's gaze. He swears that he can practically feel the brush of Yoongi's gaze against his skin.

He can hardly look away. Jungkook is so utterly stunning like this, eyes bright and dark at once, skin rosy as he trembles beneath Yoongi. He sounds half-delirious with desire, and that in itself would be enjoyable, but what he says gets under Yoongi's skin, too. Even as Jungkook hastens to submit, Yoongi finds that only makes him want all the more to give him exactly what he's longing for. He's practically shaking himself, fucking Jungkook faster, driving in deeper, the air heavy with the sound of skin against skin and the way they both gasp for breath. He rests a hand at Jungkook's waist, grips him tight enough he thinks he might leave his fingerprints burned into his skin.

"Such a good boy," he groans. "Taking me so good. You feel — fuck, Gguk, like you were fucking made for me." It's not like he has anyone else to compare him to, not like Yoongi really wants to have any grounds for comparison, but, god, he can't imagine anyone else could feel like this. Nothing could be better than the way they fit together or all the beautiful little sounds Jungkook makes. Every mewl, every keening cry, sends sparks dancing across Yoongi's skin, a shiver down his spine. How anyone can sound so gorgeous, he doesn't know, but he loves it, loves angling his hips just so to pull another whine from Jungkook or dragging his nails along Jungkook's thigh for a gasp, until he's learned how to play him like the best instrument Yoongi's ever known.

But no matter how intensely Yoongi might play at times, he knows he won't get anywhere if he doesn't take care of his instruments, and nothing and no one could be as precious to him as Jungkook is. He lets go of Jungkook's waist, lifting his hand to smooth his knuckles over Jungkook's cheek where he can see the faint indentation that tells him what the younger is doing. "No biting," he pants, letting his hand trail down to rest against Jungkook's throat. He doesn't apply any pressure, doesn't dare try until he's done some kind of research to learn how to do it safely, but he hopes that the very suggestion he might choke Jungkook will be enough for now. "I like hearing you."

Hearing Yoongi describe Jungkook as being made for him nearly brings Jungkook to the point of tears again. He's sure that some people might consider it reductive for Jungkook to be so eager to consider himself shaped around another person, but to Jungkook, there could be nothing greater than to have been made to love someone, to be the perfect counterpart to someone he's lucky enough to spend the majority of his life with. "Made for you," Jungkook breathes in acknowledgement, voice slightly broken as he hangs onto Yoongi like his life depends on it.

Maybe in some ways, it does.

Even with Yoongi's prompting, it takes Jungkook a moment to realize how he's fallen back on habits, biting down on his cheek to try and contain any noise that might give them away. Finding time for intimacy hasn't been all that difficult — they're both far too determined to let curfews and guardians hold them back — but it's always been stolen time, stolen space, a vague sense of getting away with something that wouldn't be welcome if they were to be discovered. Here, Jungkook remembers that there isn't a single soul who would bother to stop them. Here, the space is designed specifically for people like them, lovers seeking refuge and escape.

So he lets himself go. Sometimes his whimpers are quiet and overwhelmed, and sometimes he can't hold himself back from a cry when Yoongi hits just the right spot, their bodies in sync, no space left between them at all. "Feels so good, love it when you fuck me, your hands on me, ah—" Jungkook gasps, maintaining eye contact with Yoongi as he tilts his head just so, pushing his neck against Yoongi's hand, ceding control. Yoongi is the very air Jungkook breathes. "Close, I'm close."

Sometimes Yoongi doesn't quite understand why Jungkook trusts him so much. He doesn't know what he's ever done to prove he's worth trusting like this. Still, the fact remains that Jungkook does, and it's so good, so pure, so loving that Yoongi is overwhelmed by it. Jungkook doesn't just accept or like the hand at his throat; he presses into it, as eager for this as for anything else, and Yoongi vows — albeit very quickly and distractedly — to do all the research he can very soon, to make sure he can choke Jungkook properly later without hurting him.

For now, thumb stroking against Jungkook's throat, he ducks forward to press a kiss to his forehead. "Made for me," he says again. He's too far gone to clock why that seems to have struck a chord with Jungkook, but not enough to miss that it did, and, god, he means it. Nothing feels as good or as right as this, the way they're tangled together, as inseparable physically as they are in their souls. They fit together in a way he's pretty sure people rarely do, and, anyway, he doesn't care if fucking everyone finds this eventually; the fact remains that there's something impossibly special about what they have.

He's starting to tremble himself, breath falling in heavy pants and groans, knowing he's close, too, but he's not about to stop before they both come. He could reach down and stroke Jungkook, get him off that much faster, but he doesn't want to let go of his neck, and anyway, he's kind of curious if Jungkook will come largely untouched. "Come for me," he murmurs, hips crashing against Jungkook's. "So good, all mine, you're mine." He's said a thousand times that he belongs to Jungkook, heard the same in return, but he's not sure he's ever followed that through to its logical conclusion aloud — that Jungkook belongs to him. That he's his. Something about the very idea sparks something in him, strikes a nerve, adding to the increasing pressure running down his spine, tugging at his gut. They've both spent too long without someone to belong to or anyone who belongs to them. How lucky they are, he thinks, gazing down at Jungkook, to have each other. "So close, Gguk. Wanna feel you come for me."

"I'm yours, yours," Jungkook whispers, shivering at the brush of Yoongi's thumb by his throat. Even this, knowing that Yoongi's never been drawn to asphyxiation before, sends another current of heat through Jungkook. Yoongi trusts him, Yoongi takes care of him, and Jungkook isn't sure that there's ever been another person as attuned to his needs, anyone who makes him feel quite as precious as he does now, in Yoongi's arms and warm, so warm. He'd do anything to make an eternity out of his moment, for the two of them to be always together like this, so much love that Jungkook thinks he could practically drown in it.

Yoongi kisses him. Presses his palm against Jungkook's neck. Yoongi drives himself into Jungkook time and time again, and it's barely an instant every time Yoongi pulls away, but even that brief second is enough for Jungkook to feel the ache of loss, eager to feel Yoongi in him again. And then Yoongi's encouraging Jungkook to come, and there's a small whimper in Jungkook's throat — the pressure is so much that it almost hurts, not being able to touch and relieve himself. It doesn't escape Jungkook's notice that Yoongi isn't touching him either, and so Jungkook blinks his eyes open, fixates on Yoongi's in turn.

"I'm gonna, you're gonna make me come—"

Yoongi is asking more of him, and Jungkook wants nothing more than to acquiesce, staring into Yoongi's eyes, blown dark and gaze intent. Jungkook raises his hands up to Yoongi's, encouraging him to press just a little harder, his breath grown thin and reedy as it passes between his lips, and his lungs feel like they're afire, every inch of his skin ablaze, and Jungkook can't hear himself but he feels the cry that's lodged in his throat, only escaping once he finally finds release. Jungkook gasps, tightening around Yoongi as his body pitches forward; comes in waves, a repeating stanza that cuts through the stars in his vision.

Having said it once, Yoongi doesn't know why he hasn't said it a thousand times. There's such a potency in that feeling of knowing Jungkook is his, that someone he loves loves him in turn that deeply, that the person he holds dearest is his. It's a bond nothing could ever unravel, he thinks, and the same way he feels a giddiness in pledging himself to Jungkook, there's a thrill that comes with claiming him in turn.

Just as intense is the burning within him as he watches Jungkook, enthralled and adoring, as the younger boy presses at Yoongi's hand. Jungkook has never asked him to prove himself, has only ever trusted him, and still, Yoongi thinks, he wants to spend a lifetime showing that he's worth that boundless trust. He wants to make sure he spends all his days showing Jungkook how utterly loved he is, and that he was right to be drawn to Yoongi, because Yoongi loves him more than anything or anyone, more than anyone else ever could. And it's not a slight on anyone else or against Jungkook; it's just that Yoongi knows that what he feels for Jungkook is special, all-encompassing. No one could ever hope to touch it because it has no limit. So he presses a little harder, the heel of his palm notched against Jungkook's throat, and even if the way his breath grows thin concerns Yoongi, he lets himself trust that Jungkook will push him away if it gets to be too much. And the way Jungkook blazes, flushed and desperate and so, so beautiful, makes him feel he's doing something right.

He's so close himself, perched right on the edge of orgasm, drawing in breaths as deep and steadying as he can, counterpoint to Jungkook's. Determined to see this through, he keeps fucking him hard, until Jungkook cries out, clenching down around Yoongi's cock as he comes, warmth painted against Yoongi's stomach. It's fascinating and stunning and Yoongi only half-sees because all it really takes is for those tight depths to get tighter still for him to come, too, a desperate groan in his throat. He lets go of Jungkook's neck and plants his hand by his head instead, hips still rocking almost convulsively as he rests their foreheads together, gasping for air. His climax shudders through him, everything electricity and sudden sparking pleasure, vision gone white as he slows and finally stills.

Coming untouched is always an intense experience. Something about the lack of touch, the way it leaves Jungkook both wanting and overstimulated all at once, it settles into his skin with blanketed warmth. He whimpers softly as Yoongi's own climax follows, feeling the wet heat spread inside of him, shivering as he tilts his head just in time for their foreheads to press together. He can't tell which one of them is trembling, or perhaps they both are, the movements almost in tandem as they collapse into one another, limbs spent and heavy. Belatedly, Jungkook realizes that he didn't even have the capacity to keep his eyes on Yoongi as he came, and Jungkook thinks it's too bad, he missed it, that moment of pure bliss — rosy, parted lips and skin aglow with the exertion.

Maybe that's part of why Jungkook longs to cling now to Yoongi, hands still bound but fingers curling as Jungkook raises them, brushing his knuckles against Yoongi's skin. He leans up, seeking kisses even as his breath remains uneven, body still seeking air to fill his lungs but trying to keep things calm, quiet, waiting for Yoongi's permission to unravel fully. This is different than the harried passion they shared in the aquarium, however much Jungkook loved that experience as well. This is Jungkook leaving himself exposed, love stripped bare for Yoongi to behold, and as terrifying as it is sometimes to leave his fate in another person's hands, it also feels right. Relieving.

Safe.

"I love you so much," Jungkook whispers. "Just wanna stay like this forever."

"I love you," Yoongi whispers back, punctuating his words with another soft kiss before he adds, "More than anything." He doesn't really want to move either, but he also doesn't want to put all of his weight on Jungkook, and propping himself back up isn't an option, so he eases out of and off of him anyway. There's no reason they can't just stay here, curled up in each other's arms, but first, he has to release Jungkook's arms. Reaching for his hands, he presses a kiss to each palm in turn before carefully undoing the knots that hold the ribbon in place. His fingers are slippery, his arms tired, but he's not just going to leave Jungkook bound, if only because he wants to be held.

And, admittedly, because resting on his side like this, legs still tangled with Jungkook's, gives him the opportunity just to look at him, lets him take in the sweet sight of Jungkook, somehow at once breathless and composed. Peaceful, Yoongi thinks, and it makes his heart ache with happiness to see him this way. God knows they fucking deserve some peace. "Are you okay?" he murmurs as he works at the ribbons. "Your... Did I press too hard?" He nods to Jungkook, indicating his throat with a flick of his gaze. Tossing the ribbon aside, he tugs Jungkook close, pulling him into his arms. Even if he's fairly certain that Jungkook enjoyed them, Yoongi takes this part of sex seriously, checking in before, during, and after. As long as they're both enjoying themselves, he's open to a lot of things, but no thrill is worth risking Jungkook's comfort or safety. Even as he waits for an answer, though, he can't stop touching him, lifting his hand to stroke Jungkook's hair.

In many ways, the release from bondage is just as enjoyable as being tied in the first place. Jungkook watches, words forgotten and with bated breath, as Yoongi takes to each hand, pressing his lips gently against the heel, thumbs brushing against any space of skin that has been chafed by the ribbons. Such tenderness would be impossible, Jungkook thinks, if it weren't for how much Yoongi loves Jungkook. It gives another excuse for Jungkook to watch Yoongi's fingers, long and nimble, yet again skating over Jungkook like he's the most precious instrument of all.

By the time Yoongi finishes, Jungkook's beaming, his cheeks aching with the effort.

"I'm so good," Jungkook laughs, the sound bubbling over as he leans back into the bed, doubly spent now that he's been freed from his constraints. He lets himself be pulled into Yoongi's embrace, then shifts slightly to wrap Yoongi in his own, a kiss to the temple and a kiss to the cheek. When Yoongi's in control, he's commanding, alluring in a way that Jungkook's pretty sure none of the other boys have seen, but as soon as they're done, Jungkook finds himself simply wanting to wrap Yoongi up and to hold him close. "You didn't press too hard; it was really nice. I didn't think you'd actually go for it, but... god, it was hot. Just a huge head rush, I dunno how else to describe it."

Yoongi likes this part just as much as the sex, he's found, albeit in a different way. It's just nice to get to relax in Jungkook's arms, sated and loose-limbed and happy, looking at the boy he loves so much. Jungkook presses little kisses to his forehead, to his cheek, and Yoongi watches him, smiling fondly and so, so happy. Before they started dating, he knows, he wasn't nearly as content a person. He wondered too much what others really felt about him, about his place in things. He still does sometimes. With Jungkook, though, there's no doubting, no moment where he has to question this. Jungkook loves him. It feels good to be so sure of that.

"Yeah?" he asks, almost a hum, hand skimming along Jungkook's shoulder and down to his waist. It wasn't something he'd really planned on doing until he was doing it, but watching Jungkook describe it, he's glad he tried. There's still research to be done and practice, too, to be sure he's being as careful as possible, but it's reassuring to have tried and gotten it right — and looking as Jungkook, he has no doubt he really did. "It was pretty hot. There's just... something about how much you trust me. And how much you liked it." Next time, he thinks, he won't have to think so much about what he's doing and he'll enjoy it all the more for that. For now, just seeing how much Jungkook got off on it was hot enough in its own right. Yoongi won't forget the way Jungkook pressed at his hand, encouraging him to hold his throat all the tighter.

There's always a bit of warring in Jungkook's mind between wanting to clean himself up and wanting to savor the afterglow. It won't be long before their skin turns clammy, and come isn't exactly pleasant once it's drying. But when Jungkook closes his eyes, the scale seems to tip much more easily in favor of staying in bed — the sheets will get changed tomorrow morning anyway, and there's something heady about smelling sex all over Yoongi. With his vision still obscured, Jungkook traces his fingertips along the curve of Yoongi's shoulder, back to the shoulder blades, down along his spine, enjoying all the freedom of touch and movement that he had been denied only minutes before.

"I wouldn't have been able to do it with anyone else," Jungkook muses to himself. "I won't want to do it with anyone else, ever. It's... I don't know, it's still probably kind of messed up that I like this stuff, right? It's not just about the head rush, though. I think some of why I like it so much is — when it gets hard to breathe, you start seeing all of these sparks at the corner of your vision. So many colors that you can't get by painting on canvas. And then things start to seem darker, but it's not scary, it's... kind of like that moment before you fall asleep. So you're lying there, and you're so turned on, but you're also calm and you know that no matter what happens, the last thing you'll see right then is the face of the person you love most."

He turns, blindly seeking out Yoongi's lips, hitting them slightly off-center with a kiss.

It feels like something Jungkook needs to work out for himself aloud, but that doesn't stop Yoongi from having something to say about it. He leans in, meeting Jungkook's kiss first, hand wandering along his back. Pressed close together like this, he's at once all too aware of the state they're in and too comfortable to do anything about it. There's a lot to unpack about what Jungkook says, and Yoongi wonders briefly if he'd enjoy it himself; when Jungkook describes it, it mostly sounds nice, almost peaceful. But he knows himself well enough to be reasonably certain he'd just start panicking instead of being able to relax into it, and that would spoil the whole thing. Better to leave it to Jungkook, better to learn how to do it right to give him that experience.

"As long as you're careful," he says. "If it's too much, you have to stop me." More than that, he needs to learn how to recognize it for himself. It occurs to him belatedly that he wouldn't know what going too far looks like, and, if he'd crossed that point, Jungkook might not have been able to tell him. He reminds himself that he didn't, that it's fine. He has to put the same faith in Jungkook that the younger places in him. "And it's not — there's nothing messed up about it, okay?" Plenty of people get off on things just as dangerous, if not more so, even if that isn't the aspect Jungkook seems to be into. Jungkook's hardly the only person in the world who likes to be choked, and Yoongi will be damned if he lets Jungkook think less of himself for something that is, at worst, simply uncommon. "Just because not everyone likes it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with it. As long as we're safe and we're enjoying it, I don't see a problem."

Jungkook hums skeptically when Yoongi insists that there's nothing wrong with having such a fetish. However glad Jungkook is that his boyfriend is willing to try just about anything that pleases Jungkook, there's a part of him that won't ever feel quite normal given his proclivities, Jungkook thinks. It's not normal to want to put oneself in a dangerous position. Not normal for there to need to be a safe word to stop them from going too far. It's a level beyond the unease that Jungkook already felt about the fact that he wasn't only attracted to girls — at least there, he can rightfully point out that all good people are deserving of love. But asphyxiation and bondage feel irrational.

"Well... if it ever makes you feel uncomfortable, you have to let me know, okay?" Jungkook asks, trying to stem the flicker of doubt that passes through his chest, wondering in retrospect if Yoongi was uncomfortable. Or if he would be, had they gone further than they did. Biting his lower lip, Jungkook shifts, pulling Yoongi closer still, wrapping his arms securely around the elder's shoulders. "I should've. Should've made sure you were totally okay with it just now, I — it was so nice that I stopped thinking."

Something about that takes Yoongi by surprise, his eyes widening briefly. He's so quick to check in with Jungkook, to be sure that he's happy and cared for and comfortable. He forgets to check in with himself. Part of it is that it's so instinctive just to do what's going to make Jungkook happy, but, he thinks, mostly it's that he gets so caught up in what they're doing, it doesn't occur to him to stop. That in itself seems like a good sign, though. If he'd really been bothered, it would have been enough to cut through the enjoyment.

He traces small, gentle patterns against Jungkook's back, lifting his head to press a kiss to his forehead. "I'm okay with it," he says. "I want to do some research before we try it again, but it's okay." It might not be his kink, but it's not like he finds it upsetting either, and it makes Jungkook happy. That seems like reason enough to give it another go some time. "I think I'll be more comfortable when I'm sure I know what I'm doing. And you..." He huffs out a soft laugh, fond. "I don't expect you to be doing a lot of thinking when you're tied up and getting fucked like that. You're not supposed to have to think at that point." He is. He's the one who should be on top of these things. When he ties Jungkook up like that, when Jungkook gives up all control, he also takes away his need to have to think about these things. He's pretty sure that's part of the pleasure of it.

"Yeah, that's — that's true, I guess," Jungkook chuckles, gaze skirting down again, bashful and shy. There's no doubt in Jungkook's mind that part of what makes being submissive appealing is the ceding of control, of having someone else choose the path for him. Still, Jungkook knows that he wasn't exactly as passive just now as he should have been — he has a hard time holding back with the way he vocalizes, has a hard time keeping himself from expressing all of the things that he wants. Even now, without so many words, Jungkook finds himself nuzzling as best he can against Yoongi's cheek, seeking comfort.

Jungkook's pretty sure he'll never quite be able to stop himself from expressing those desires, so it's important for Yoongi to know that they never have to tread that path at all, if Yoongi isn't comfortable doing so.

"Just promise me anyway," Jungkook murmurs after a pause. "That if it ever makes you uncomfortable, you'll stop. We'll stop. There's like, a million and one other things we can do together that I find just as hot, so. I wanna make sure you're having a good time, too."

It's a small laugh, but it's a laugh nonetheless, enough to make Yoongi smile, relieved. This is the kind of thing they really do need to talk about, he knows that, and he wants to, however awkward he might be at it. But he also doesn't want Jungkook to feel bad, especially right on the heels of having felt so good. If he can make him laugh even a little bit, that makes it a lot easier to continue.

"I promise," he says, quietly solemn. "I'm not..." He sighs, fumbling for the right words, to put his thoughts in order. "If I feel like I might be hurting you — not in a fun way — I can't do that. I'm not gonna do that. I promise I'll stop if I'm not enjoying it." And, as far as he can remember, he's never been faced with that dilemma. Even when they've done things that weren't necessarily his kinks, he can't say he hasn't enjoyed them. Hell, he didn't think he was into any kind of bondage before they started sleeping together, but it turns out that sex with Jungkook is helping him to discover all kinds of new things about himself. And there's a lot Yoongi doesn't like about himself, but he refuses to feel guilty or wrong for doing things that make them both feel good.

"I wasn't uncomfortable," he adds after a moment. "Or... a little. But mostly because I don't know what I'm doing and it made me kinda nervous. But you looked like you liked it and it was hot and I just got caught up in it." His cheeks are hot as he says it, a faint embarrassment making his chest tight as he talks it out, as much for his own sake as for Jungkook's. "I guess that's what makes me uncomfortable. Not you or what you want." One of them should be in control. It's supposed to be him. If he lets go completely, too, what's to keep him from fucking up in a way that gets one of them hurt?

"At least I'm not really in it for the pain," Jungkook jokes with a small grin, fumbling briefly with his hands, holding them restlessly against his own chest. "Not that there's anything wrong if someone is, but — if it really started to hurt, I'd definitely let you know. So you don't really have to worry about that." Even though this topic is far from a gentle one, the feelings Jungkook experiences when Yoongi describes the effect the intimacy had on him are nothing but soft, soft, soft. Even when the both of them are caught in the midst of passion, Jungkook thinks, there's always so much of Yoongi's heart and mind that's reserved for making sure that Jungkook is safe and well. Almost as though Yoongi's own self-preservation depends on Jungkook's well-being.

He's not sure that there's anyone else in the world who's felt similarly about him. Even Jungkook's mother isn't quite that attuned to her son, Jungkook thinks. It takes her a lot to notice when something's wrong with her son, and even more time to wheedle the truth out of him. For Yoongi, it seems intuitive.

So maybe it isn't the worst thing in the world that Jungkook didn't ask when Yoongi placed that hand against his throat.

"Maybe we can... watch a video together sometime?" Jungkook asks, wondering aloud. "See if there are things that other people do make sure that it's safe. Though I'm guessing that I'm probably pretty tame compared to most."

Yoongi runs his hand along Jungkook's arm, reaching for Jungkook's hand to pull against his chest, absently bringing him close to feel the way, even now, Yoongi's heartbeat races for him. He smiles and he nods and he leans closer to give Jungkook a soft kiss. If Jungkook did want to be hurt, Yoongi's not sure that's something he could do, even for Jungkook. That he doesn't makes all of this a lot easier. A little pain heightens the pleasure, and Yoongi's not opposed to that, but he's seen, in brief glimpses, what other people do. That's fine for them, but he has no interest.

The idea of watching porn with Jungkook, though, that's interesting. It's not the first time Jungkook's suggested it, but it strikes Yoongi as a particularly good idea now.

"That's good, though," he says. "If it works for people who are... less tame, then it'll help us be safe, too, right?" Yeah, he knows, porn stars have a full crew around them to make sure everyone's safe (at least, he hopes they do. He hasn't given the production value much thought either), but they still have to know what they're doing. Not that he usually watches that kind of thing for its instructional value — though he has to admit there have been exceptions, even after Seokjin warned him against it, but it's not like he can go to Jin like Okay, so we're good at the sex part, but how do I go about eating out Jungkook? when Jin would have to still look them in the eye later — but, but, in this case, he can see how it would be useful to them. He gives Jungkook's hand a squeeze. "And I don't know, watching it together... might find some other stuff we wanna try."

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