lovestrippedbare | 𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

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yoongi

𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕚𝕔𝕠

There are times, Jungkook thinks, when unexpected changes in plan work out for the best. Giving up on the idea of Busan during winter break wasn't the easiest choice at the time — Jungkook had expected it to be the highlight of their winter, and giving into the pressure of Yeongwook's blackmailing hurt on multiple levels. But distance seemed safest. Planning, biding their time, having Jungkook carefully siphon a portion of his allowance over to Yoongi for safekeeping, every passing day made the trip feel more viable again, until the two of them suddenly realized that Yoongi's birthday would be an easy occasion to leave for, and that was that.

They've picked up memories along the way. The first night Jungkook had Yoongi stay over. The first dinner together with his mother, with her offering countless thanks for helping her youngest with his studies. A trip out to a nameless beach, all seven of them together, huddled and bracing against the last of the winter winds.

Getting to March isn't as difficult as Jungkook expected it to be, and now that they're here, the wait has made everything all the sweeter.

He takes countless pictures with his camera — of their seats together on the train, of the little box meals they buy from the lady with the cart. Of the ramyeon they buy an hour later, when it's clear that the box meals are more packaging than substance.

Of Yoongi, staring out the window of the train car, a soft smile on his face.

At first, Jungkook struggled with the idea of spending much of Yoongi's birthday on the train, but the trip to Busan takes several hours at best, which would have required missing class on Friday. Seeing Yoongi's peaceful expression on the train helps to set a little of that regret to rest, as does the stifled laughter they share as they stumble down the hall to their room in the hotel.

"Hotel Elysee," Jungkook says with a flourish as he waits for Yoongi to swipe their room key. "Is that, like, French?"

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Jungkook levels Yoongi with a look, then elbows his waist gently. "Aish, you really — I don't know how you can still be so clueless about your looks when I've told you a million times," he sighs, tone slightly petulant. He glances over at Yoongi, eyes tracing along the line of Yoongi's profile. "You're so beautiful that anything would suit you. Your features, your proportions — everything's just right. You're the kind of model that everyone wants to get in art class, you know? So that means that you've got what it takes to pull everything off. If you wanted to, anyway."

There's an earnestness with which Jungkook speaks, a conviction behind his assessment of Yoongi's appearance. He knows that everyone has their preferences, but there's really nothing about Yoongi's face that Jungkook thinks people would dislike. He may not have the largest eyes, or the widest smile, but he doesn't have to. It's the full effect that makes him look like a work of art.

"Of course, if you wanted just a plain navy suit, no frills, that'd probably work too," Jungkook muses.

"Maybe I just like to hear you say it," Yoongi says, though he can't help the flush that creeps into his cheeks at the compliments heaped upon him. It's not like he doesn't know Jungkook thinks that way, or even like he doesn't like how he looks himself. It's just something entirely else to hear it said like that, his heart thumping unsteadily.

"If I'm such a good model," he adds, "when are you going to draw me?" For a moment, he thinks it's a silly idea, mostly because he doesn't know if he's patient enough to pose for long. Then he remembers the times Jungkook's taken pictures of him sleeping and, really, that he can do. He tugs gently at Jungkook's hand, lips slightly pursed, and cocks his head, waiting for an answer.

Maybe he'll try on a suit with satin lapels. Just to see.

"You mean you haven't seen how my sketchbook is already filled with endless pictures of you?" Jungkook asks, smiling to himself at the thought. There was a time when letting Yoongi know about his sketchbook would have been absolutely mortifying — embarrassing at best, creepy at worst — but now that they've been dating, Jungkook sees no more reason to hold back. He's liked sketching all of his hyungs, but Yoongi draws his attention most for obvious reasons.

Especially when he's seated at the piano.

"I would love to actually draw you when you're sitting for me though," he admits with a small grin. "Instead of sneaking glimpses every couple of minutes when you're at the piano. Or when you're asleep. Have you actually sat for anyone before though?"

There goes that plan.

"No," Yoongi says, an air of confession to it even as he smiles. It's flattering to think of how many pictures there might already be of him in Jungkook's sketchbook. He knew there were some, but the way he says it, it sounds like more than Yoongi was already imagining. That, somehow, feels like something even more solid than the words Jungkook uses to describe him; he spends time with his art, focuses on it.

It's odd, Yoongi thinks. Even when he knows how attractive Jungkook finds him, knows how much they love each other, it still catches him off guard sometimes to be reminded of it.

"But it's just sitting. It can't be that hard. Which way should we head?"

"I'm pretty sure at least three-quarters of what's in that book are sketches of you," Jungkook says quietly, the tips of his ears flushing as he glances off to the side, avoiding Yoongi's gaze. Okay, so maybe it's still really embarrassing to admit, even now that they're dating. When Yoongi sees the pages, it might only get worse — Jungkook's sketches have just as often been of Yoongi's hands as they have been of his face. For a while, the drawings tapered off slightly, back when Yeongwook discovered them and thought to use them as blackmail.

But after a while, Jungkook stopped worrying about that. If his relationship becomes known to his stepfather, he'll deal with it then. No point in denying himself something he loves in the meantime.

"Anyway, sitting's — if we really wanted to do it like the art classes do, you'd be sitting naked," Jungkook points out, giving Yoongi's hand a squeeze. There's a part of him that can't deny being pretty excited at the prospect of dedicated time to map out Yoongi's body with his pencil, the opportunity to observe every plane of muscle. The only question is whether or not it'll end up being too much distraction. He glances past the crowd, considering the street. "Should we... head back to the hotel? Take a break before dinner?"

Yoongi watches him, taking in the flush that colors Jungkook's cheeks, curving up to the tips of his ears, and smiles, almost shy himself. It's not just that it's flattering, being the subject of that kind of attention and devotion. It's that it's somehow awe-inspiring, another reminder of how ardently he's loved. If they had a little more privacy, he'd kiss Jungkook for it. Instead he just smiles and squeezes his hand.

And sputters a little at the idea of posing naked. Which is silly, he tells himself, because he's been naked in front of Jungkook a hundred times or more now. But then, it's always been when they've been intimate, utterly caught up in each other. Simply sitting and letting Jungkook map out his body on the page seems more exposed somehow, as if he might more easily catalog Yoongi's flaws that way.

Still, better just Jungkook than an actual art class.

"Yeah, I think you mentioned something about cuddling," he points out, turning in the direction of the hotel as he turns the thought over in his head. "I could do that. Posing, I mean. If you want me to."

Jungkook grins at the prospect of cuddling. Maybe the suggestion will turn out to be more literal than he's sure it sounds right now — after all, they brought each other to orgasm not that long ago. But maybe the privacy will be enough to inspire more intimacy between the both of them. Either way, Jungkook knows it'll be perfect, that what matters most of all to him is simply having that time that Yoongi and him can take for themselves.

He wishes it were possible to extend this trip, wishes they could experience what it'd be like to have this kind of day be the norm rather than a rarity. Someday, he thinks. Someday, once their careers have established and they're coming down from the urgent race of securing their place in society, they'll be able to spend time together like this regularly.

"I would really love if you posed for me," Jungkook admits with a small nod, giving Yoongi's hand a squeeze back in return. "I mean, I like seeing you naked in general... but something about, I don't know. Being able to take the time and see all of you, try to capture it in art... it'd be really nice. And we obviously don't have to do this with you naked all the time, like — maybe sometimes it can be you in your clothes when you're doing normal things like homework or, or when we're cooking. I think the thing I really want is to have the time to capture those moments, you know? One way or another."

They're such little moments, things Yoongi doesn't really think about on his own, and the thought of Jungkook somehow turning them into art awes him. To be part of that, to be made into art, to have someone who sees him like that... The same way, he realizes, he sees Jungkook, wanting to find some way of expressing how he feels in a manner that's more externalized, like a song. Though he would never consider it in terms of Jungkook deserving it, he wouldn't have to wonder how he could. When it comes to himself, though, it's hard to understand how he got so lucky as to be loved so well. Whatever nerves he felt about the prospect ebb away.

"Yeah," Yoongi says, nodding, touched. "No, that'd be... I can do that. That'd be nice. Any time you want." It's strange how, even now, awe can turn to shyness, how he can still be so amazed and caught off guard by the depth of their feelings. Having this time together today has been more, better, than he'd let himself dream. It feels like a chance to get to know each other even better than they already do, luxuriating in the freedom of being alone, no parents to watch over them, no one to hide from. "I like watching you draw anyway."

"You're not allowed to peek before I'm done though," Jungkook says, his tone just on the cusp of a whine as a flush spreads over his cheeks again. He's never been great at drawing when other people are watching him do it — perhaps one of the greatest reasons why he doesn't spend much time on art classes, finding himself a little self-conscious when scrutinized so closely. But perhaps he'll be able to break that habit with Yoongi, whom he knows isn't going to criticize him before he's made a good effort. (Actually, he's not sure if he can imagine Yoongi ever criticizing his art at all.)

"I remember when I took Jimin hyung out for a shoot, he kept on trying to swipe the camera and make sure I was capturing him well," he laughs, turning his gaze back to the path ahead of them. "And that's not half as nerve-wracking as having someone peek at your sketches, 'cause at least the camera doesn't really lie or mess up in getting someone's likeness. But with the pencil, I can't ever really — I can't ever quite get there. The process is fun, though. Trying as hard as you can to show other people what you see, even though it'll never be perfect."

Yoongi smiles, shaking his head. "I won't peek," he says, "but you're being too modest. You're good." Maybe it's just that Yoongi can barely sketch more than a stick figure himself, but he admires Jungkook's skill with pencil and paper. At least when he draws people, they generally look like themselves. Yoongi's not even sure he can draw a recognizable dog, and, even if he could, it wouldn't make Jungkook any less impressive to him.

He can easily imagine what Jungkook describes, Jimin desperately grabbing for the camera, wanting to see how he came out. Yoongi, on the other hand, is willing to wait and bide his time. When Jungkook's ready to show him, he will.

"I like seeing what you draw," he continues, tracing circles with his thumb against Jungkook's hand. "Even when it's my face."

"I'm a hobbyist," Jungkook says with a slight sigh between his teeth. He won't say that he's bad, necessarily, at art. Or photography. Or any of the other activities that he's picked up and dabbled with in his spare time. There's a reason why all of his hyungs call Jungkook talented, and he's willing to concede that the initial learning curve is one that he seems to do fairly well with. It's when he hits the plateau that Jungkook finds that he struggles more, though it's unclear whether that's more a result of a lack of time or a dearth of effort.

He doesn't have any sort of prodigal talent, that much Jungkook can say for sure. Not enough for him to really try and push to make a living off of the activities he enjoys on the side.

"But I will admit that I'm getting pretty okay at drawing your face. And your hands. I mean, it'll never be nearly as beautiful as the real thing, but..." Jungkook purses his lips with a playful shrug of the shoulder. "Paying close attention has some payoff."

Something pulls tight at Yoongi's stomach and all he wants is to lean over and kiss his boyfriend, and, for a moment, there's a spike of bitterness, knowing he can't, not safely. It isn't fair. They deserve to be as disgustingly affectionate as all those other couples. But there are too many people around as they make their way back to the hotel, and Yoongi has to settle for letting go of Jungkook's hand to slip his arm around his waist.

"I mean, isn't the real thing always just a tiny bit better?" he asks. "With all art. Can't kiss a sketch. Can't really hold it either. Doesn't mean it's not beautiful." Hobbyist or not, he sees talent in Jungkook's work. Maybe he'll never make his living as an artist, but Yoongi sees beauty in it anyway. It's not very practical, true, but art for art's sake matters. If he could make a living off his music, he would, but he'll keep playing all his life even if he never makes a dime off of it. Nothing could stop him. And maybe Jungkook doesn't have just one thing he's like that about, but Yoongi's always admired that, too, in its way, that he could pick up so many things so readily.

"Can kiss and hold a statue, though," Jungkook says, his tone slightly cheeky. "Have you ever seen pictures of that one statue — Cupid and Psyche? I bet that's better than the real thing. Or, well. Whoever those models were that posed for the statue, because I'm guessing that they weren't as deeply in love with each other as Cupid and Psyche were supposed to be." He sees Yoongi's point, though. Anything real that inspires art may very well be better than the art itself — that even classics like Van Gogh's floral still lifes probably don't capture everything he loved and admired about the plants themselves.

"But I guess when it comes to the things we love... yeah, no amount of art will ever compare to the real thing. No art could be half as beautiful as you are to me," Jungkook smiles, closing his eyes as he turns his face up towards the sun, enjoying the warmth of the rays against his skin. He should probably put on some additional sunscreen; he might regret not doing so later. But for now, it's enough to indulge in the sensation, yet another detail that pulls the perfection of the day together.

"I don't know that one," Yoongi says, unfazed by his lack of familiarity. He likes art well enough — for that matter, a visit to an art museum might make a fun date — but he's not that familiar with most stuff that isn't pretty well-known (or even, probably, a lot of that). "Show me? And please don't kiss any statues."

Far more important than not knowing a given piece of art is the last of what Jungkook has to say anyway, proof of Yoongi's point. Art is special, he won't argue that. A good piece of art, be it painting or sketch or statues, has the power to move people just as much as music can. He'd just never trade the real thing for even the finest artwork of it, so if Jungkook's art doesn't quite hit the mark, maybe that's just a flaw in the very fact of art.

"I think they ban you from the museum for life for that."

"Pft, like I'd even be able to get myself to the Louvre anytime soon," Jungkook scoffs with a shake of his head. For someone who enjoys sketching and painting as much as he does, Jungkook doesn't consider himself nearly as well-versed in the area as Yoongi is with his classical piano, but he's certainly perused lists of most famous works now and again, wondering if the opportunity would ever arise for him to go see them himself in person. He's heard that the Mona Lisa isn't nearly as impressive in person as people would hope, so maybe it's all best left in his dreams.

He pulls his lower lip briefly between his teeth as he pulls out his phone, quickly punching in the search term and pulling up photos for Yoongi to see. It's entirely possible that Yoongi's at least seen a picture of the statue somewhere, even if he doesn't know it by name. Something about the way Cupid looks at her, Jungkook thinks, makes his stomach flutter.

"See, look. It's pretty great, right? I can't imagine what it takes to be able to carve that out from a piece of stone," Jungkook marvels, handing his phone over.

"Add it to our list," Yoongi says, slowing to a stop as he lifts the phone closer to get a good look at the statue. "One more place to go. Wow." It's stunning, something impossibly delicate and vivid about those sculpted expressions, a palpable love between Cupid and Psyche. "How does anyone even do that?"

It's like any other form of art, really. Music, paintings, sculptures — people can do incredible things with them. Even if Yoongi still thinks the best of it is often still a shadow of what inspired it, they're shadows that make people think and feel. He has no idea how anyone puts pen to paper or fingers to keys and makes that happen. He just hopes, one day, he'll learn.

Handing the phone back to Jungkook, he starts walking again. "It's really beautiful."

"I don't know, and it's carved out of stone," Jungkook reminds Yoongi, shaking his head at the sheer amount of dedication and talent that must have gone into carving the statue. There are countless others from that period of time as well. It makes Jungkook wonder if, with the advent of technology, art like that has taken a step back or two. Fewer people going into art, into music, and opting instead for the high-paying jobs. Their generation doesn't have a Beethoven. Doesn't seem to have a Van Gogh or Michelangelo. "I can't even imagine carving my name into stone, let alone a sculpture that'd last for so many centuries."

Jungkook pulls in a deep breath, taking his phone back from Yoongi. He's not going to let himself get discouraged by the talents of someone who was clearly one of a kind. It's okay not to be that kind of talent, Jungkook thinks.

Happiness is still more important.

"You know what's more beautiful than that, though," Jungkook remarks with a soft smile. "The way I catch you looking at me, sometimes. Like those rare occasions when you wake up earlier than me in the morning."

Yoongi glances over, surprised and shy and pleased all at once. He's never going to get over this, not ever, he's sure of it. Nothing could dim the sweet, gentle pleasure of loving this much and being loved so much in return. To be compared to the finest of art and know it might actually be true — that if anything could be better, it's the real thing, and that, if anything could bring his feelings so visibly to his face, it's Jungkook.

"Like I said," he says. "Art's at its best when it comes closest to real life. Or furthest, sometimes." There are pieces so beautiful, they transport him to a more peaceful frame of mind, elevate him above the day to day, and that's a gift as powerful and necessary as the ability to bring to life things more grounded in reality. He hardly dares compare himself to such things, but if Jungkook does, well, it's enough to know that. "And the way I love you..." He holds Jungkook's gaze a moment, pulling it away to make sure he doesn't walk into anything. "Nothing more real than that."

Three months isn't an incredibly long amount of time, considering. Most people would argue that Jungkook and Yoongi aren't out of their honeymoon phase yet, that as much of their current attraction may stem from the physical alone as it does from anything deeper. But Jungkook thinks that previous experience isn't necessary for him to be sure about what they have, about how well they suit one another. There are many ways in which Jungkook knows that he's childish — his attention often jumps from one topic to another, from one hobby to the next, but with Yoongi, there's only the desire to build towards something greater. Something lasting.

Yoongi makes him hope for forever, and there's nothing that can diminish that for Jungkook.

"Only a few months ago, I thought I was crazy for even wanting you to look my way," Jungkook grins to himself, swinging their hands a little bit higher as they walk. "I still feel like... like I need to do something to really deserve all the love you give me. Ace my exams. Get into a good university. I mean, I'm pretty average."

"Yah," Yoongi exclaims, amused and faintly embarrassed. "I thought I was crazy." Maybe, on some level, that's part of what drew him to Jungkook — all the little touches and glances he can look back at now and know were out of love, all the things that made him feel so special with the younger boy. And it's true that he still does make Yoongi feel special, but he knows now there's much more to it. This is love, as pure and true as it gets.

"And you don't need to do anything," he adds, shrugging. "You're not average to me." Practically speaking, sure, Jungkook doesn't have the best grades and he's not a genius at any one particular thing. So what? He's Jungkook, and that's exactly who Yoongi loves, no matter what he does or doesn't do. If Yoongi had wanted someone more academically inclined, he'd be looking elsewhere. What he wants is this boy who looks at him like he's moonlight — his boy who's so passionate and energetic and charming, no one could help but love him.

"I mean... maybe you're a little crazy for dating beneath your level," Jungkook says, his words slow and coy as he tilts his head back and forth. It's not entirely an exaggeration, Jungkook feels. Yoongi's grades are certainly better than Jungkook's own, and even his demeanor draws its fair share of admirers, as far as Jungkook can tell. Maybe Jungkook's a bit taller, more athletic — but aside from height, even the athleticism is something that Jungkook bets Yoongi could pick up if he had a desire to. (The fact that Yoongi still handily beats Jungkook in basketball seems to be proof enough of that.)

And none of that even begins to touch on Yoongi's talent at the piano, his ability to interpret old classics and even come up with melodies of his own.

Jungkook's the one who lucked out.

"Ah, seriously though. I really thought — you know, when you mentioned liking someone else, I thought it was some noona in your year. I wanted to really scope out your classroom to see who it might be, but that would've been a little too, uh. Creepy and stalkery. Probably," Jungkook muses. "But I figured it'd be some beautiful and edgy girl."

"If you keep saying you're beneath me," Yoongi says, but he can't come up with an adequate punishment. He's terrible at actually holding anything against Jungkook anyway. Still, even when Jungkook is teasing — practically flirting — Yoongi doesn't like to hear it. It's not that he thinks Jungkook is quite like him, that he takes that kind of talk as utterly to heart as Yoongi does, but still, it implies insecurities without any reason. They're equals. Whether Yoongi's older or not or if he gets better grades, it doesn't make them any less on even footing.

Still, he laughs a moment later, rolling his eyes. "When did I have time to meet some beautiful, edgy girl?" he asks. "I was with you all the time. I thought you'd catch me. Who else could it be?" Maybe one of the other boys, admittedly. He spends almost as much time with the others as with Jungkook, if not quite as much. At least the suggestion it might be one of them made more sense than some mysterious girl.

"Well, when you said it wasn't one of the others, I thought — I don't know! Like, you can obviously meet girls in class. Or like, a cute barista at one of the coffee shops you go to, or something. It happens all the time in dramas," Jungkook remarks, wrinkling his nose. His experiences with dating aren't very broad, and even what he knows through his friends is limited, leaving him with mostly fiction to work off of — and he knows that fiction isn't the most reliable source for how life works, even if it makes for some fun daydreaming at times.

Jungkook purses his lips, leveling Yoongi with an extended look. "Even if it seems obvious in retrospect, seriously, what else was I supposed to think at the time?" he chuckles. "I don't have enough of an ego to think that it could've been me. Especially since we clearly started off friends and all. I was feeling bad enough for developing feelings for a friend in the first place."

Yoongi bites back another laugh at the mental image of himself, lovesick over some girl he only ever saw in a coffee shop. It's not impossible. It does happen in dramas and he's sure it happens in real life sometimes, too. It just isn't very him. Still, he gets it. Anything seems more likely than requited love when you're in the midst of pining.

Which is exactly what they were doing, pining, like a pair of idiots. The whole thing is funny to him now, but at the time, it was utter agony.

"I wish we hadn't had to feel like that," he says, "but I'm glad that we're friends first." No matter how close he is to the others, he already thought of Jungkook as his best friend, and dating hasn't changed that. It's reassuring to know he loves someone who has his back and loves him just as he is. He pulls a face then. "Every now and then, I wondered if I had any hope at all. And then I felt bad for even thinking it. Like I was lying to you."

Jungkook nods slowly, thinking back to his own emotions around that time. There's probably a lot of overlap in what they experienced, he thinks — a needless amount of shame and fear that was a constant undercurrent in their friendship. He squeezes Yoongi's hand for a moment, glancing to either side to make sure that they're still heading in the right direction, and that passersby aren't so close that they'd be able to eavesdrop.

"Yeah, when I realized that I was falling for you, it made... everything complicated. Like every time we were hanging out and I didn't tell you how I felt, it was — I don't know — me being misleading, or using you, or... honestly, I still think about it sometimes. If I should have spoken up sooner, or if it's okay in a situation like that to not say anything. Say, if you didn't like me back," Jungkook says, glancing over and meeting Yoongi's gaze, his lips pursed in thought. "If I knew for sure that you didn't like me back. Would it still be okay for me to try and spend so much time with you? Is that dishonest?"

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